I think people sometimes get confused about what love is. Sometimes, love is telling someone they are making poor choices. Sometimes it’s telling them you won’t help them. Sometimes it’s helping people see that there are so many other, more important things.
Tough love is a concept that’s hard to grasp for some people. I feel like it’s about loving someone enough to help them, even if they don’t always want or appreciate help.
Of course, sometimes you have to let people make their own choices. You have to stand on the sidelines and let them run their lives.
But that doesn’t mean you in any way have to say that you agree, or help them make poor decisions.
I learned a great lesson about tough love during high school. The tough love came from the most loving person I have ever known, my Heavenly Father.
I didn’t do anything crazy, but I didn’t always make the best choices as a teenager, like many teenagers. I didn’t make some good decisions, and it lead me to a lot of heart ache and hurt.
I remember praying and praying to figure out what to do better, for help to be a better person, etc.
The impression came so clear to me, “Maddy, just knock it off. Just stop it. Just stop being so stupid.”
Now that was probably my own mind saying those specific words, but the message from Heaven was clear. Tough love means that sometimes you’re told to just knock it off. To grow up, to stop making bad decisions. That wake up call was exactly what I needed. It taught me about my life, and it taught me SO much about love.
It’s a hard lesson to learn, but it’s one I am SO grateful for. Love doesn’t mean it’s always easy, sugar coated, lovey-dovey language. Sometimes love means telling someone something, or hearing something, that you didn’t want to hear or say. And you do it anyway.
Because you love them.